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Being positive is always better than being negative – in my opinion. There is always more research coming out on this subject and despite the odd example where being negative helps you more (no doubt produced by negative people) the vast majority of information points to the benefits of having a positive rather than negative outlook.

How then do you get to be more positive?

Make a list of positive qualities

There is a simple technique called positive listings.

We are often very good at knocing ourselves and believing that we are no good. It could be that some time in the past some well meaning (but very helpful) person has pointed out some failing in your life and has made you feel horrible about yourself. This can be worse when it is someone whom you love or respect. Parents, teachers, Doctors, Dentists etc are all guilty of this at some point or another. We may have done it ourselves – and then hopefully later regretted it.

What we need to do is to think about the positive things about us and this will then help us to think more positively about ourselves which will help us to achieve more and feel more confident.

Get yourself a piece of paper, a pen and somewhere you can write where you will not be disturbed.

Write down your positive qualities.

If you struggle to think what they are then think about the following and find the positive qualities that apply (you may find more than one for each or none for some these are just to help you think):

• Relationships
• Talents
• Values
• Qualifications
• Humour
• Creative
• Sports
• Feelings
• Experiences
• Others

Take your list and read through it slowly.

 You need to take some care to read through what you have written. Try to remember the experience that made you write down your list of things. Accept that they are part of you and feel good about them.

Try one of these

The next thing you can do is to write down each thing in the third person e.g. put your name in to the sentence i.e. Chris is kind and loving, Chris is good at walking, Chris has a good sense of humour etc

Then try writing from the 1st person e.g. I i.e. I am kind and loving, I am good at walking.

Try to feel happy that these are your good qualities.

By accepting that these are all part of you, the individual, you can reinforce all these positive thoughts, feelings and perceptions, which then lead to enhanced beliefs.

What things can you say are your positive qualities?

Leave a comment telling us what they are

Gaining confidence in yourself is a process. Real confidence grows and develops over time. However there are some very simple ways to increase your confidence straight away. All you need to do is to act more confident and your confidence will start to grow.

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