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To achieve anything you need to be motivated. At some point all of us has wanted to achieve something but few of us ever actually ever do. Self motivation comes from having a dream or a goal that is so tangible that you can see it and feel it. In this series of posts we are going to explore how you can reach the point where you can motivate yourself to achieve your dreams.

Know what you want

The first step in getting yourself motivated is to know what you want. You will often hear people say that you must do something for yourself (e.g. if you are going to lost weight or give up smoking then you have to do it for yourself and not for anyone else). This is only partly true. Some of us can be motivated by the thought of doing something for someone else. If you have a faith then you will be familiar with the idea of doing something for God. If you are deeply in love with someone then you may get motivated by doing something for them.

The important thing is that you know exactly what you want.

Imagination can help

Most of the things that you want do not actually exist. Even if you want something like a car or a big house the actual one that you are going to aim for is in your imagination. The better you can imagine something the more powerful the motivation. Take some time to build a picture of what you want in your mind so that you can almost feel it. If possible right those feelings down in as much detail as you can.

What do you want?

If someone were to ask you the question: “what do you want”, would you be able to answer them?

It is very hard to get motivated about something that you only vaguely appreciate. Many people say that they want happiness but happiness is such a vague idea that it is a very poor motivator. If you can describe what happiness looks like then you are more likely to be motived by that image.

Don’t be put off by thinking that if you imagine something that you don’t get you will be disappointed. It is better to have tried and been disappointed than not to have tried at all. If there is a chance you could gain what you have always wanted why do hold back on the chance you might not get it – that sounds like nonsense to me.

Get going

So right now set yourself a time when you are going to think about what you want. Then in that time develop a clear idea of what you actually want and get the idea so fixed in your mind that you find it hard to think about anything else.

In Britain we have a saying: “the grass always looks greener on the other side of the fence”. It means that things always seem better for everyone else than they do for you – so we should take time to realise that this is not true. Although the grass looks greener it actually isn’t, it is just the same old grass we all have.

I was reminded the other day of the time I returned to Britain after working in California for a while. I was struck by just how green everything was, it wasn’t just green it was a vibrant eye-watering green. Some of you might have had this experience yourself.

Of course as time passes the memory of how green everything is in Britain fades and you get used to it.

One of the dangers in life is getting used to things – whatever those things might be. As we get used to them we start to think that perhaps the grass is greener somewhere else. We need to learn to recognise that we are surrounded by wonderful things every day. We need to notice, as it were, the greenness of our own lawn.

This is perhaps most clearly seen in our relationships. There is something wonderful and comforting about getting used to being around people – it helps us relax with them. But sometimes this leads to a perceived kind of boredom. We start to think that other people are more interesting than the ones we have around us. We need to learn to see the people we mix with as if we have only just met them. We need to learn to appreciate the beauty and wonder of the people we see every day.

So let me encourage you to see your friends, your wife or husband, your partner, etc. as if you had just seen them for the very first time. Enjoy being around them and don’t let the green grass syndrome get you down.

It seems that your gran might have been right after all because it seems that happiness is not related to success in work or with having lots of money. In fact achieving goals does bring happiness but only when those goals are related to: growing as a person; having loving relationships; contributing to your community. Wealth, fame and good looks just won’t do it.

A new study by three University of Rochester researchers demonstrates that progress on these fronts can actually make a person less happy.

You can read more on this at:

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2009/05/090514111402.htm

Your mind has the power to make a big difference in your life. Your imagination has the ability to shape your success. You can use your imagination or let your imagination use you. I come across a lot of people who imagine all kinds of terrible things about themselves – things which are usually not even true. Somehow their imagination has run riot over their self-esteem. They quite often imagine that they are no good for anything or that everything they try is doomed to fail before they begin. This is all rubbish of course it’s just that there mind has made it all up.

Don’t let your imagination do this to you, instead use that power for your own good. Instead of letting your imagination do whatever it wants take control of it and point it in directions where it can help you.

Another word here might be creative, get creative with your mind about the situations you face. When a problem comes along get your creative side working on a solution. When you have an opportunity let your creative side go on planning how you can make the most of the situation.

Your will is so often controlled by what your brain is imagining. Don’t let your imagination bring you down instead force it to help you.

One of the most sought after commodities in anyones life is peace. There is even a children’s book written about a mum who can’t find five minutes peace. The great news is that peace is a free commodity – it won’t cost you a penny to buy. However, the bad news is that this is not something you can simply buy, there is no shop where you can go in and say, “I’ll take five minutes peace please”.

You will find plenty of charlatans who will try to persuade you that they can sell you peace – but they are wrong. Peace is not something you can buy and you can’t get it just by following a new exercise regime or purchasing the latest book about it.

The truth is that peace is something you only get by working at it.

To get peace you need to give yourself a gift of some time

If you want more peace in your life then you need to take some time to get it. Now I know that is is possible to have inner peace even when things seem to be like bedlam all around you but you can’t get that without first of all learning how to do it. So you will need to give yourself some time. I suggest finding at least 15 minutes every day for this. Put it in your diary now.

To have peace you need to be filled with peaceful thoughts

If your mind is full of frantic and desperate thoughts then you will never find peace. You can go to the most wonderful place in the world but if your mind is full of activity then you will not find peace there. The only way to find peace is to put peaceful thoughts into your mind.

You can do this in many different ways. You can use words that are peaceful to help you think in a peaceful calm kind of way – try words like: calm, clear, still, rest, etc. Or you could think about peaceful places you have been to. Or you could make use of a relaxation exercise. Or you could go to someone very peaceful and let yourself indulge in the peace.

Whatever you do you need to get some peaceful thoughts into your mind.

Another way

I hope you will indulge me for just a moment because I want to share a way that I have found peace – a deeper peace than I could have found otherwise. Please don’t think I’ve gone all nutty and religious on you here but I just wouldn’t feel comfortable keeping this to myself when you are searching for peace.

I find that God provides me with a deep inner peace. As a Christian it gives me great comfort and peace to know that God loves me. I still need to think those peaceful thoughts (there is a lot of good stuff in the Bible if you want some extra help on this – if you are not sure where to start then try Psalm 23) but without my faith I don’t get the kind of peace I can get otherwise.

In studies this simple truth has been shown time and again. People with a faith tend to be less stressed than those without. You make your own mind up but I’m happy I have what I do.

Do you want to be successful? Are you successful now? What are you doing to make yourself more successful? It can take quite a long time for a plan to come together and during that time you need to be persistant. However if you keep doing the same thing over and over again then you will only ever get the same results. If you want something different to happen in your life then you need to do something different.

This is such a simple, yet important, rule that you ought to commit this one to memory.

Let’s say you want to be more successful in life. Well you will only get to be more successful if you do something different.

Let’s say you want a better relationship with someone else. If you always treat that person the same then you will always get the same kind of relationship.

Let’s say you want to get fitter. If you only ever take the same exercise that you always take then you will stay at the same level of fitness.

Let’s say you want to lose weight. If you always eat the same kinds of food that you do now then you will always be the same weight (or greater).

Let’s say you want to win a race. If you do the same things that you do now in a race then you will continue to come in the same position.

People who don’t get this basic rule tend to talk a lot about luck. They will say that they will win or be more successful if they can get lucky. They look at others and comment on how lucky those people are to be successful. Luck has nothing to do with it – they are doing something different.

So when you know what you want to do make sure you have a plan to do it and if that plan does not work then change it. If your new plan is less successful you can always return to the first or try another way again. But if you always do the same thing you will always get the same result.

Within the Christian faith there are no set ways of praying. Jesus never gave us a specific formula to use or a structure to stick to. Even when Jesus taught his disciples the Lord’s Prayer (Luke 11) he was only giving them something to say when they pray and it was never intended to be the last word on prayer. This means that Christians have great freedom in the way they meditate or pray. In effect we can do what we like as long as we do it in the right frame of mind and heart.

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This time of year exercising can be extra hard. The mornings and evenings are dark and it’s cold outside. It’s a lot easier to be lazy. This is just the time of year then that we all need a little extra boost in our motivation. I got mine this weekend when I went for a walk in the countryside.

The benefits of countryside walking have been known for a long time. Just today I heard about a report that said people with dogs tend to be fitter and less stressed than those without them. Having a dog forces you to get the exercise that helps make you fitter and lower stress.

But you don’t need a dog to get exercise.

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I once read somewhere that we should never tell someone that they have failed at it. I don’t agree. It seems to me we need to wake up to the fact that sometimes we fail. But failing is not the problem, the problem is how we view that failure.

If you listen to Simon Cowell on the X-factor you will often hear him saying things that sound at face value to be nasty. He will point out what is wrong with a performance when others seem incapable of saying anything negative. Now I’m in favour of being positive but if someone is doing something wrong then they need to hear about what they are doing wrong.

When you understand this simple truth you can start turning a loss into a gain.

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All of us have some idea of what we think we are capable of. It could be that we think we are not good at running or that we are not good at selling. Maybe we believe that we are ok at some things but rubbish at others. Most of what we believe is based on what others have told us and just a little on life experience.

The bad news is that these beliefs can stop us succeeding but the good news is that we don’t have to settle for thinking this way. There is a way to start to think differently and here it is …

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