bythemethod.com blog

Gaining confidence in yourself is a process. Real confidence grows and develops over time. However there are some very simple ways to increase your confidence straight away. All you need to do is to act more confident and your confidence will start to grow.

It’s a funny old world. If we pretend to be more confident then it will help to grow our self confidence. It seems that there is a part of our brain that is really not very smart and it can be hoodwinked by other parts of our brain into thinking something is true. The part of your brain that makes you feel confident is one of those gullible parts.

You may have spent years telling this part of your brain that you are not very good at anything and your confident brain has believed it.

However we are going to outsmart that part of your brain with some simple deception.

Now ordinarily I would not recommend deception but in this case it is quite justified. The truth is that you should be more confident but after years of being knocked your confidence has decided to throw in the towel and believe the nonsense that has been fed it. Time to take out the trash (as Homer Simpson would say).

Start to walk and stand more confidently

People will low self confidence tend to stand with rounded shoulders, looking at the floor and with a shy hounded expresion on their faces. Standing like this confirms to your brain that you are not confident.

So force yourself to stand up straight. Push your shoulders back, and smile.

Be adopting a more confident posture your brain will get confused and start to think that perhaps it had you wrong and you are more confident after all.

Copy someone you admire

Think about someone that you admire for their confidence. Then observe them. How do they stand. How do they smile. What is it about them that you admire. Copy those behaviours. Be careful not to lose your own identity and don’t become just a mirror image of someone but copy the posture and the way of behaving that makes you believe that this person is confident.

Look in to other peoples eyes when you speak to them

People who lack confidence also tend to look at the floor when they speak to others so start to look into the eyes of people you speak with. You don’t have to stare them out or make you think you are falling in love with them but simply look into their eyes when you speak to them.

Once again your brain will be fooled and you will start to feel more confident.

Dress confidently

People develop styles of dress that reflect something about themselves. People who are not confident tend to like big and baggy clothes, clothes that are neutral colours, scruffy clothes. So start to power dress. Get yourself some more confident clothes. That means to dress smartly, include a little colour (not too much because we are going for confidence not be become a childrens TV presenter) and wear clothes that fit. If you need to then find a friend who dresses well and ask them to help you.

It helps to always be neatly groomed as well.

When you start to take a little pride in the way you look you will start to feel more confident in yourself.

Other things you could try to improve your own self image

• Volunteer to help when you can.
• Sit in the front row.
• Smile at people and say hello to them – other people love this.

Next time: We will be continuing to think about building self confidence by improving your self talk.

Let others know how they could improve their self image

Do you have any tips that you could offer to help others to improve their self image? Why not leave a comment about ways that work for you.