bythemethod.com blog

Well of course it all depends on the context but for a moment let me assume that you are thinking about a state of mind, something that self help gurus are always going on about.

It is important, in any endeavour, to make sure you are in the right state of mind but it is even more important to understand what a state is in the first place.

A “state” is the way we are thinking at a moment in time. So we can find ourselves in a positive state or a negative state at any moment. We might be in a motivated state or de-motivated state at any moment. I think it is possible to have more than one state of mind going at any moment but not to have opposing states. For instance, it is possible to be positive and yet be in a nervous state at the same time (althlough being positive usually does help with nerves). However it is not posible to be positive and negative at the same moment. You may well find, however, that you quite often wobble from a positive state into a negative state and back to a positive state and so on very quickly.

Another way of saying ’state’ is ‘mood’. Perhaps you are more familiar with talking about moods.

You can change your state at any time you choose

It’s a strange thing but we can choose what state of mind we are in.

I always used to assume that my state of mind was down to how I was feeling. If someone upset me then this would put me in a negative state, or if somone praised me this would put in a happy state and so on. I would spend my days letting other people and my health dictate what kind of mood or state I was going to be in. What a good way to waste a life.

It took me around twenty years to work out that my state or my mood was actually in my control. I don’t have to let people tell me how I should be, I can chose for myself.

Choose a better state than the one yu are in

It takes a little practice but it can be done. You can choose to be in a better mood (state) if you want to. I guess the key here is the word ‘want’.

Decide what it is you want. Then choose to enjoy a state that gets you what you want.

What if the going gets so tough you just can’t get the state you want?

Sometimes this will happen. There are some techniques to help you, a very powerful technique is known as anchoring. More about that at another time.

The first thing to do is to find some space - a little time and quiet. Then think back to a time when you were in the state of mind that you want right now. Work hard at reliving the feelings you enjoyed in that state and use those feelings to pull you back into the state you want to be in.